Not Letting Go
by Rosel
Summary: Bonnie just wants to take what she can get and haunt Jeremy in peace, but Kol has other plans. And so does Damon.


**Not Letting Go**

**Disclaimer: I Don't Own Vampire Dairies**

**Spoilers: It's set right after s4 finale.**

**Pairings: Kennett, Bamon, a little Bermey (I'm not sure which one is endgame in this fic yet Bamon or Kennett)**

Bonnie Bennett tried to concentrate, she closed her eyes, and she took a deep breath, well whatever worked as a deep breath anyway now that she was dead. She tried to pull herself towards Jeremy so he could see her, so she could talk to him, so all of this wouldn't seem so hard. She was not having much luck though and she was getting frustrated. Part of the reason was she kept on being disturbed by that insipid laughter. She turned around and bit out, "Will you stop that?"

"Sorry, darling." Kol said smirking.

Then he continued, "You just look too adorable when you are all flustered."

Bonnie rolled her eyes and said, "Will you please leave me alone? I am trying to concentrate here."

"Oh, yes, little piece of advice. If you truly wanted to see your love it would not be this hard." Kol said.

"Shut up! How are you even here? I thought vampires were alone on the other side."

"Oh well, I figured if you wanted to haunt your friends so much, I would haunt you until…"

"I got tired of you and what cast a spell to bring us back to life?" Bonnie asked skeptically.

"Look at us finishing each other's sentences." He said gleefully.

"It is impossible Kol. We're dead. There's no changing that." Bonnie said.

"Yes, maybe for anyone else, but not you. You already defied so many laws of nature what is one more?"

"It is done Kol. You are just going to have to accept that and move on."

Kol chuckled, "Like you are doing such a bang up job of that so far. You are trying to see your ghost seeing boyfriend."

"How do you know that?" Bonnie asked.

"I heard you chanting. 'Oh, Jer, please, please talk to me'. Pathetic. You know guys like girls who play hard to get."

Bonnie fumed and demanded, "Just get out of my way Kol."

"Or what?" He asked seeming to be enjoying himself a little too much.

She moved passed him trying to ignore him and concentrate. This was ridiculous. It was not hard for ghosts to haunt people, especially if they have unfinished business. Why was it so hard to see Jeremy now? Then something dawned on her and she turned to Kol briskly, "That's it. It's you! You're the reason why I can't see Jeremy!"

"Oh, Bonnie, I'm flattered, you'd rather be with me than that little boy."

"No, it's you, you are doing something to keep me away." She said with a certainty.

He put his hand over his chest pretending to be appalled.

"Who me?" He asked overdramatically.

"How are you doing it?" Bonnie demanded.

"How could I be doing anything? I am a mere Original Vampire. I couldn't possibly be doing anything."

"You shouldn't be able to do anything, you should be all alone haunting people unable to talk to a soul drowning in your own misery. Instead you are here haunting me. And I want to know why!" Bonnie said getting angry.

Kol merely shrugged his shoulders.

"Your threats will not affect me here."

"And yet, you think I have the power to bring you back." Bonnie said.

"Possibly, yes."

"How?"

"I'm not sure."

Bonnie screamed, "Ahhhhhhh."

His smirk formed into a smile.

"Why? Why does this make you smile?" Bonnie asked overly annoyed.

"You're cute when you're angry."

Bonnie shrugged.

She put her hand on her temple calming herself down not really knowing if it would help at all since she was a ghost all of these feeling of anger and frustration weren't physical since she had no body but so much still felt real. She had no idea how that worked.

She went to Kol and said, "I know you are keeping me here, but if you really think there is any possible way to bring us back then I have to talk to Jeremy. He's our only foothold in this world."

Kol rolled his eyes and said, "Fine, if we must."

He waved his hands and suddenly they were at the Salvatore Manor where Jeremy was reading a book at a desk.

Bonnie shook her head not pleased at all that Kol, had this power over her. She did not like the idea he had this kind of control of where she could go. She had to push it back and just be glad she could see Jeremy now.

He looked up surprised, happy tinged with a tiny bit of sadness, "Bonnie."

"Jeremy."

Kol made the gagging gesture.

Jeremy jumped up and ran to her and stopped just short of hugging her being reminded that he could not touch her.

"I don't know how much longer I can take this. It's hard to lie to Elena and Caroline has been calling you like crazy, and even Damon's suspicious. It's only been a couple of days." Jeremy said sounding kind of miserable.

"I just want to give them a good summer. They've been through enough." Bonnie said.

"Oh, please!" Kol said.

Bonnie ignored him, than she looked back at Jeremy. She realized that if Jeremy saw him, he would say something but he didn't say a thing. He didn't even look his way. He could not see him. What in the world was Kol up too? How was he doing this?

"I just wish you could be here too. I don't know how I am supposed to go on living knowing you died bringing me back." Jeremy said.

She gave him a small smile and said, "It is going to be okay."

Jeremy shook his head not so sure.

BKBKBKBKBKBKBKBKBKBKBKDBDBDBDBDBDBDBD

Damon Salvatore should be happy. He should be in perfect incandescent bliss right now. He finally got the girl, things should be freaking perfect. But there was just something that was bugging him. And his name was Jeremy Gilbert. He came back alive and Elena was thrilled and that made him happy. He was glad that Bonnie was able to zap him back alive again and presto change-o make everything better which is what she always did. It was crazy that after everything she was able to do that. But whatever Jeremy was back, Elena was happy, and therefor he was happy. But it has been two days and the guy was still here moping in his house like a little boy who just lost his puppy. He did not get it. If his girlfriend had brought him back to life after being dead for months he would be showing her how much he appreciated her. They would he be having days and days of sexcapades and he most certainly would not be hanging out with his sister and new founded boyfriend. Come on this was supposed to be his and Elena's time to having uninterrupted sexcapades now that she chose him. But how could he even do anything of the sort with Jeremy moping and lurking the hall ways. Not to mention the way he came back was just so damn suspicious. Why in the world would Bonnie bring her boyfriend back to life only to leave with her absentee vampire mother? It just didn't make any sense. It didn't sound like anything Bonnie would do. It sounded like the kind of lame excuse she would say to cover up some crazy magic supernatural gambit she was pulling so she could save everyone. They usually worked but they always made him nervous. He wanted to just be done and enjoy his bliss but he could not let it go. Bonnie was up to something and he could not really accept his new found happiness until he found what it was.

Damon stormed into his study and asked unapologetic, "Hey, little Gilbert. Why aren't you having 'thank you for saving my life' sex with the little witch?"

Jeremy scowled at him. He said, "That is none of your business."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, I get it. I don't want the deets but why are you here and not there bowing to her feet. She saved your life again and I thought you two were in love or whatever. I mean she almost unleashed Hell on Earth for you, so what gives?"

Bonnie stared at Damon aghast, "Oh geesh, now he's suddenly concerned about me."

Then Kol said, "Uh, him again and with his annoying fixation with Bennett witches. He probably has a crush on you."

"Oh, please, he does not have a crush on me!" Bonnie blurted out.

Jeremy stared at her confused. He started to scan the room.

Damon looked at Jermey complexed and then he suddenly became angry.

"Oh, no Jeremy, I know you can be dumb sometimes, but even you can't be this stupid!" Damon yelled.

"What are you talking about?"

"Did you not learn anything from the last time. Or I don't know did you not learn anything from the whole Katsia-Silas situation. There is no wrath like a witch scorned?"

"I don't know what you're…"

"It's obvious you're talking to a ghost! Little piece of advice Jer, if Bonnie Bennet saves your life, you thank her. You don't freaking cheat on her with a ghost twice! What is wrong with you?!" He yelled veins nearly popping out of his head.

"That's not what's going on here." Jeremy defended.

"So there isn't anyone here?" Damon asked.

Jeremy didn't say anything.

Bonnie hated how persistent Damon got. She knew how hard headed he could be once he found a new mystery to obsess over but she honestly didn't think he would care enough to obsess over her absence. She thought he'd be too enraptured with Elena to notice she was even gone, or for him to even care at all.

Now that she knew Damon was on her trail. She knew he wouldn't give up.

"Just give him a convincing lie Jer." Bonnie pleaded.

"It's not Anna. There's a different ghost."

"Who?"

Bonnie began to pace and she said, "Jer, no you promised, don't tell him!"

"Oh, uh, you know uh Alaric."

"Oh, Alaric. Really?"

"Yeah."

He stared at him.

"Oh, Alaric Okay can you do me favor?"

"What?"

"Ask him where we hide the liquor at the school?"

"Uh…I…"

"Yep. That is what I thought. Lying liar full of lies."

"I'm sorry Damon. I can't tell you."

"Fine don't tell me. Something is up with Bonnie and your lies and I think I'll just visit her mom to find out."

"No! Don't let him do that Jer! She'll get suspicious and then she'll find out…I can't have anyone know not yet." Bonnie said panicking.

Jeremy looked at her heartbroken.

"Jer. What is going on?"

Then Jermey said, "It's Bonnie."

"Yes. What is going on with her?"

"She's dead. I'm talking to her right now." Jeremy said not really able to look Damon in the eye.

Damon stood there in disbelief.

"Say what?"

"She died. Bonnie is gone. She…she died trying to keep the veil up so I could stay. She realized what a mistake that was after she died, she closed the veil up anyway, and brought me back to life." Jeremy said just letting it all out as he described what happen. He could not help but let all of the grief, regret, and guilt out in his crackly voice.

Damon stood there perfectly still for a moment. He stared aghast out into the abyss. Then he shook his head and said, "No, no, NO! Bonnie Bennett does not die!"

His face changed, his eyes sparked red and he bared his fangs as he super sped to Jeremy and threw him against the wall.

Then he growled, "The little witch does not die!"

Then Bonnie said, "Damon get off of him!"

"He can't hear you." Kol said amused.

She shook her head, "This was not supposed to happen."

"What did you think would happen that everyone would forget you?" Kol asked.

"No. I just wanted them to have a good summer."

"Even this imbisole." He said pointing at Damon.

Bonnie ignored him, really wishing she was corporal and could kick Damon's butt right now.

Why did Damon have to be so hot headed all of the time?

"How could you let this happen?" Damon yelled as his fingers clenched tightly around his neck.

Bonnie shook her head, "Jeremy, your still a vampire hunter, you're still one of the five. Defend your self!"

Jeremy just looked at how angry and hurt Damon was. It gave him little motivation to stop him. He felt so low himself. He wished there was something he could have done to stop Bonnie from dying.

Then suddenly Elena came speeding in and threw Damon off of Jermey, "You have got to be kidding me! What is going on?"

Then Damon said, "Look me and Jer just were having a little dispute."

She looked at him with her eyes wide open not believing that for a second.

"Jer? What happened?" She asked Jeremy.

"It's nothing. You know Damon, you know how he gets sometimes. It was just a misunderstanding that's all."

"A misunderstanding." Elena repeated in disbelief.

"Yeah. About Bonnie." Damon said.

Jeremy looked at him pleadingly.

"Bonnie. Oh my gosh. Are you really going to let this be your latest obsession? Bonnie isn't trying some master plan that is going to screw up our summer. Will you just chill out about that already?" Elena asked frustrated.

"She's your best friend. Aren't you worried?" Damon asked like he was testing the waters.

"No, I'm not she's fine, spending time with her mom. She probably wants a break from all of this crazy supernatural stuff for a while."

"Yes, to escape the supernatural stuff she's visiting her vampire mom?" Damon asked hoping Elena got his sarcasm.

"She just needs time. Can you please let it go and not obsess over it?" Elena asked her eyes pleading.

"Yeah, I guess…" Damon started to say then he looked at the book laying on the desk, he realized it was a grimoire.

"No, nope, I'm not letting it go sorry."

"Damon come on. We're finally happy stop making excuses." Elena said frustrated.

"I'm not making excuses, but I'm not ready to let her go just yet. She's up to something and I plan to find out what it is."

"Fine, keep your crazy obsession!" Elena yelled frustrated and stormed out of the room.

Jeremy breathed out in a strange relief, he realized just like Bonnie he was not ready for Elena to find out yet either.

Then Jeremy said, "Thanks for not telling her. Bonnie doesn't want anyone to know yet, especially Elena."

"She doesn't take grief so well as a vampire." Damon said.

"Yeah. So just keep it to yourself and forget about it." Jeremy.

He looked at Jeremy and said, "No, that's not going to happen. I am not just going to forget about her and either are you."

"Well, yeah. Of course I can never forget about her." Jeremy said as looked at Bonnie with pain in his eyes.

"That's not what I mean." Damon said.

"What do you mean?" Jeremy asked weary.

"I mean we're going to bring Bonnie back." Damon said determined.

**A/N: Well there it is. Hope you like it. Let me know what you think.**


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